To the poor adorable boy sitting next to me on the downtown 6 train at about 6:30 this evening: Yes, I heard you fart. It was pretty loud, and those hard subway benches didn't help anything. And yes, the barely contained hysterics you observed were due to the fact that I heard you fart somewhat noisily on a crowded train. It was a long day, and it was goddamn funny.
But don't feel bad, it happens to the best of us. I wasn't really laughing AT you, just at the...er...event. And you were still adorable afterward, even with that unbelievable shade of red you turned. You and your boisterous butt made my day just a little better. So, uh...thanks, I guess...for farting on the train. Yeah.